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如何治愈心理疾病?接纳自己!
2021-10-27 14:39:21    作者:网易首页

接纳自己,会让我们认识到,我们的痛苦,是人类本身就很容易遭受的正常情况。没有人能够逃避麻烦,所有事情都是不完美的,我们天生就会犯一些错误,我们的欲望总是会超过现实,我们会伤害我们爱的人。如果我们能够接纳我们本身就不完美,我们就会更容易接受自己的不适,不会因为没有工作而感到过分内疚,也不会因为没有完成的要求过分自责,我们会更加关爱自己,相信自己值得善待和尊重。

中英字幕

One of the great contributing factors to mental illness is the idea that we should at all costs and and all times be well. We suffer far more than we should because of how long it can take many of us until we allow ourselves to fall properly and usefully ill.

心理疾病的一大促成因素是一种“我们必须不惜一切时刻保持健康”的想法,我们承受的远超我们能够承受的范围,因为我们中的许多人要花很长时间才能允许自己真正的倒下,好好生一次病。

In a crisis, our chances of getting better rely to a significant extent on having the right relationship to our illness; an attitude which is relatively unfrightened by our distress, which isn’t overly in love with the idea of seeming at all times ‘normal’, which can allow us to be deranged for a while in order one day to reach a more authentic kind of sanity.

在危机中,我们能恢复的几率很大程度上取决于我们是否跟生病有着保持适当的关系,这种态度往往不会被我们的痛苦吓倒,也并不喜欢永远保持“正常”。这可以让我们混乱一段时间,以便有一天达到一种更真实的理智。

It will help us immensely in this quest if the images of mental illness we can draw on at this time do not narrowly imply that our ailment is merely a freakish and pitiable possibility, if we can appeal to images that tease out the universal and dignified themes of our state, so that we do not ? on top of every thing else ? have to fear and hate ourselves for being unwell. We stand to heal a great deal faster if there are fewer associations like those created by Goya (of madness as the seventh circle of hell) and more of men and women a little like you and me, sitting on the sofa, able to combine our inner wretchedness with other, more temperate and attractive qualities ? so that we remain every bit human, despite our terrifying convulsions, absences of mind, catastrophic forebodings and sense of despair.

在这个过程中,这样做会有很大帮助,如果我们此时可以利用的精神疾病的形象,而不是狭隘地暗示:我们的疾病是畸形的、可悲的。如果我们能够借助那些可以梳理出我们状态的普遍的,庄严的形象,我们就不会一直害怕或讨厌自己的“不太舒服”,我们就能够恢复的更快一些。如果我们能够少产生一些好似地狱里的魔鬼创造出来的形象,多创造一些像你我一样的人们,和像你我这样的女人,坐在沙发上,能够把自己的内心的痛苦与其他更温和、更吸引人的品质结合起来,这样我们就可以做一个更好的人。尽管我们会因为害怕而抽搐,有时心不在焉会产生灾难性的预感和绝望感。


The best philosophical background against which to wrestle with mental unwellness would be one that conceived of the human animal as intrinsically rather than accidentally flawed, a philosophy that would resolutely reject the notion that we could ever be perfect and would instead welcome our griefs and our errors, our stumbles and our follies as no less a part of us than our triumphs and our intelligence. It is Japan’s Zen Buddhism that has historically perhaps best put forward such notions, with its bold declaration that life itself is suffering, and its veneration in the visual arts ? and by extension in its psychology ? of what is imperfect and un-glossy: rainy autumn evenings, sadness, moss covered roofs, stained wooden panels, tears and, most famously, misshapen and irregular pieces of pottery.

与精神不健康作斗争的最好的哲学依据是,认为人类这种动物有着天生的内在缺陷 而不是后天偶发缺陷。这种哲学将坚决反对人类是可以完美的这种观点,而认可和接受人们的痛苦和错误。我们的失误,我们的愚蠢和我们的胜利,智慧是一样的。日本的禅宗可能是历史上最好的解释这样的理念的哲学,它强调生命本身就是一种承受,在禅宗的视觉艺术以及其延伸的心理学中,对不完美、不光鲜的事物表示崇敬:秋夜多雨,忧伤,青苔覆盖,屋顶,斑驳的木板,眼泪,以及最著名的形状不规则的陶器。


Against such a background, it becomes a great deal easier for us to accept ourselves in our unwell state. We feel less guilty that we are not at work and are not playing up to the roles demanded of us by responsible others. We can be less defensive and frightened, more inclined to seek out proper care ? and more likely to recover properly in time.

在这样的背景下,我们更容易接受自己的不适状态,我们不会因为没有工作而感到过分内疚,也不会因为没有做到上司给我们的要求过分自责,我们会减少自我防御和害怕,我们会更好的关爱自己,就更有可能及时恢复。

With a philosophy of acceptance in mind, we can recognise that whatever the particularities of our crisis (which will naturally need to be investigated in due course), our pains fit into a broad picture of a crisis-prone human condition. No one is spared. No life can escape significant troubles. Everything is imperfect. We don’t have to know the details of someone’s life to be able to guess at the scale of the difficulties they too will have encountered. We have all been born to inadequate parents, our desires will always exceed reality, we will all make some appalling errors, we will hurt those we love and anger those with power over us, we will be anxious and confused, woeful and lost. We should accept both that we are profoundly unwell ? and that our ailments are entirely normal.

本着接受的哲学,我们可以认识到,无论我们的危机有何特殊之处,这些危机会在之后适当的时机去处理。我们的痛苦可以被归纳为人类本身就容易遭受的正常情况,没有人例外,人生都无法逃避重大的麻烦。所有事情都是不完美的,我们不需要去知道某个人的生活细节,才能够猜测他们将遇到的困难程度。我们都是天生的不称职的父母,我们的欲望总是会超过现实,我们会犯一些可怕的错误,我们会伤害我们爱的人,激怒那些控制我们的人,我们会焦虑和困惑、悲伤和迷失。我们应该接受两点:一是我们本身就不完美;二是我们的病痛完全正常。

Japanese philosophy has another lesson for us at this point: we will probably one day be fixed but there are likely to be substantial and ineradicable marks. And yet, these marks can be worn with pride and self-respect. According to Zen Buddhism’s tradition of kintsugi, an accidentally smashed bowl isn’t to be thrown away in embarrassment, its pieces can be carefully collected and reassembled with glue inflected with gold. The traces of repair are made obvious, celebrated and cherished, as if to suggest to us ? as we bring a cup to our lips ? that we do not have to give up on ourselves or be ashamed of our own brokenness.

在这一点上,日本哲学对我们还有另一个教诲:我们可能有一天会被修正,但很可能会有大量的无法消除的痕迹,然而,这些痕迹是可以成为我们的骄傲和自尊的,根据日本禅宗的金继技术,不小心摔碎的碗不会被就这样地扔掉,它的碎片可以小心地收集起来,可以用金粉胶水粘合,修复的痕迹故意被做的明显、称颂和珍视。当我们用杯子喝水时,好像是在告诉我们,我们不必放弃自己,或因为自己的不足而觉得羞愧。


We can confront our illness without panic or fear, with a quiet intelligent sadness perhaps best captured by the word melancholy. If we were searching for a patron saint of such a melancholy relationship to mental difficulty, we could do worse than pick the Welsh artist Gwen John, who combined a brilliant career as a painter with moments of harrowing mental collapse ? but remained all the while fundamentally on the side of life. From her self-portrait, John implies that she would understand whatever we might be going through, her eyes hint that she has been there too, that she could be our guide to the underworld of our minds ? and that, however much we might hate ourselves at this moment, we deserve gentleness, patience and respect as we feel our way towards repair.

我们可以面对我们的疾病,无需害怕惊慌,以一种安静的智慧的悲伤去接受。这种哲学可以被称为:物哀哲学。如果我们要寻找一位物哀哲学与内心痛苦关系的大师,我们可以找到威尔士艺术家格温?约翰,他将辉煌的职业生涯与精神痛苦与崩溃的时刻结合在一起,同时又完全敬畏生命,从她的自画像可以看出,约翰暗示,她理解人所可能经历的一切,她的眼睛暗示她也曾经历过,她可以成为我们通往思想深处的向导,无论我们当时多么憎恨自己,我们都值得善待,耐心和尊重,这些将会陪伴我们逐渐恢复健康。


翻译:KazuR

审核:Leon Yong

免责声明:本文来自腾讯新闻客户端自媒体,不代表腾讯网的观点和立场。



 

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